Wednesday, January 4, 2012

Movie Review “Transporter 3”

Jason Statham as Frank Martin
Natalya Rudakova as Valentina

Short Story Summary: Frank Martin is forced to deliver an unknown package after having a bomb strapped to his arm.

Story: (2/10) The story in this movie was really bad. It was confusing in some parts, predictable in others, and was boring throughout. I really can’t put into words how bad this movie is. The only way I can put how bad the story is would be to say that the Twilight movies have a better story then this and those are terrible(Yes, I had to suffer through those abominations).

Characters/Cast: (4/10) The cast is either bad or know they’re in a bad move, so they are not trying. Jason Stratham looks board out of his mind throughout the movie and does not give his usually good performance. His character is made a fool out of and it is just sad to see. The female lead Natalya Rudakova, who plays Valentina, gives a horrible performance and you are wishing the whole time she is on screen that the bomb on her arm would go off. Her character is annoying , winy, and not the least bit attractive. Everyone else was just as bad, if not worse.

Action: (2/10) The fights where so disorientating, due to sloppy editing, that I actually got a headache from watching them. I watched the first two Transporter movies, so I know that Jason Stratham can do better than this. He just does not seem into making this movie and it shows big time. The car chases in this film were also bad and not the least bit thrilling. The only part I liked was near the ended were Stratham’s character drove a car off one train car to another one. By that time though, I was so sick of this film that I really didn’t really care all that much about it.

Music: (1/10) It was bad, yeah, no surprise there. If the rest of the movie is bad, why not the music too.

Visuals: (4/10) Well, the cars were okay to look at, some of them anyway. Everything else was either nothing special or badly done, so this movie, on top of everything else, was bad to look at too.

Conclusion: This is a badly made movie in every sense of the word. DO…NOT… WATCH… THIS…MOVIE!!!

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